Today’s post is the first in a five-part series called Set Apart, with excerpts taken from Set Apart: Becoming a Virtuous Woman in a Modern World. I, along with several other bloggers, collaborated to write this new 28-day devotional for women based on the principles found in Proverbs 31. Today’s study is written by Kendra Stamy of A Proverbs 31 Wife.
She brings him good, not harm,
all the days of her life.
She does him good. What does that mean? Nearly the entire chapter of Proverbs 31 talks about all the good things she does. Isn’t it a bit redundant to say “she does him good”? Isn’t caring for her household, being a good steward, and reaching out to the poor, doing good?
She does him good. Him. The focus is on her husband. So how does a wife do her husband good? When I read this I see an issue of the heart, and a focus on doing her husband well in all things.
Many women seem to be extremely gifted with an abundance of words. When we have a good day you will know it, and when we have a bad day you will also hear about it. Our words can be a blessing or curse to those around us.
One thing I have noticed among women is that we tend to try to one-up the person speaking. “Oh your boss was crabby yesterday? Well you should hear what my co-worker did to me!” Or “Your child woke you up 3 times last night? At least he wasn’t puking like mine was last week.”
What happens when the conversation turns to our husbands? Do we do him good?
I have heard some of the worst husband-bashing conversations and sadly enough, in the past I joined in. Even worse, I was in a group of Christian women who were old enough to know better. I had been married less than a year, and in order to fit in and be like these “seasoned wives” I found some trash to toss at my dear husband as well. It didn’t do him good, and it didn’t honor him at all.
Doing him good means using our words to build him up and support him, even when he is not around. When we only say good about our husbands it turns our focus from his annoying, quirky traits, back to the very reasons we married him. Additionally, we may continue to discover new and wonderful things about him that we had not noticed before.
The words we use are our own choice. We can choose words to do him good or we can choose to do him harm. Will your words bring him honor, or dishonor?
One parting thought: If we look forward to verse 23, it states that her husband is known in the gates and that he sits among the elders of the land. How did he get there in that place of honor? Could it be because his wife showed him great honor first?
Father, I come to you now, praying that you will guide my tongue. I pray that you will help me to see and make mention of the good in my husband. I pray that you will give me the words that will build him up and do him good. Whether I am speaking to him or to others, I pray that my words will honor him always.
Other Contributors to Set Apart:
Ashley Roe, Joyful Thrifty Home
Kendra Stamy, A Proverbs 31 Wife.
Danielle Tate, More Than Four Walls.
Sarah Nichols, Simple Life, Abundant Life.
Jennifer Fountain, Growing Up Triplets.
Karli Von Herbulis, Feed Me Mama.
Anjanette Barr, Raising the Barrs.
Virginia George, Virginia George .Com.
Rachel Marie, Day to Day Joys.
Crystal Hatcher, Wisdom Seeking Mommy.
Whitney Cornelson, Beauty in the Mess